Eulogy opening lines

The first sentence of a eulogy is the hardest sentence in the whole speech. Get past it, and the rest tends to write itself. The opening line decides the key the room will read the next five minutes in. Warm? Quiet? A little funny? Reverent? Pick the one that matches how your person was actually held in the family, not how you think a eulogy is supposed to sound.

Below are ten original openings, grouped by tone. They are starters, not scripts. Borrow one, change the names, and let it carry you into the second sentence. For more on how the rest of the eulogy should hang together, see our main guide on how to write a eulogy.

Heartfelt openings

These work for almost any relationship, almost any room. They lean honest, not sentimental.

1. There is no version of the rest of my life that does not have my mother in it. I have been trying, for three days, to picture one. I cannot.
2. Most of what was good about me, I borrowed from him. I would like to spend a few minutes telling you which parts.

Celebratory openings

For a life that was long, full, and well-loved. The room is already grateful. Help them be grateful out loud.

3. Eighty-seven years. Three children. Eleven grandchildren. One wife, for sixty-two of those years. We are not here today because we lost him. We are here today because we got him.
4. I want to start with a number. Two thousand, four hundred and twelve. That is roughly how many Sunday dinners my grandmother cooked for this family. We came. We ate. We stayed too late. She was glad.

Brief openings

For when you have ninety seconds, or when the family asked everyone to speak short. See also our companion piece on short eulogy examples.

5. I will be quick, because that is how he liked things.
6. Three things, about my brother. Then I will sit down.

Humorous-tender openings

Humor is a kind of love. It is also a kind of permission, given to a room that may need it. Use a humorous opening when the person was funny, and only then. Do not perform humor a grieving family does not feel.

7. If my father were here, he would have already corrected my pronunciation of his name twice.
8. My sister hated being late. She is going to be furious that she is the reason we started ten minutes after the program.

Reverent openings

For services that lean religious, or for any service where the room is craving stillness. These give the room permission to breathe.

9. We are here, in this room, because of one quiet, ordinary, extraordinary life.
10. There are people the world barely notices, who hold up entire families. My mother was one of those people.

How to choose

Read each one out loud. Notice which one makes you feel steadier, not weepier. The opening line should give you a floor, not a cliff. If you wobble on the first sentence, you will wobble through the whole speech, so pick the one that feels almost easy to say.

And remember: the opening is not where you prove your love. The opening is where you settle the room so you can prove it in the middle. Once you have a first line, our piece on how to read a eulogy without crying will help you carry it across the lectern. If the person you are writing for was a parent, you may also find our guides on writing a eulogy for a mother and writing a eulogy for a father useful.

For the other end of the speech, see our companion list of eulogy closing lines. If humor belongs at your service, see funny eulogy examples.