Funeral planning checklist

This is a plain checklist for the first week after a death in the family. You can print it. You can split it among siblings. You do not have to do it all yourself. Most families divide the list into three buckets: paperwork, service, and people. Below is a walk through each. For the wider arc, our companion piece on what to do after someone dies covers the first hours through the first year.

In the first 24 hours

• If the death happened at home and was unexpected, call 911.
• If it was expected at home, call the hospice or the doctor.
• Notify immediate family, in person or by phone, not text.
• Decide where the body will be transported (funeral home or crematorium).
• Find any pre-arrangement paperwork the deceased may have left.
• Pick a funeral home. They will guide many of the next steps.

In the first three days, paperwork

• Get at least 10 certified copies of the death certificate.
• Notify Social Security (if applicable).
• Notify the employer or pension administrator.
• Locate the will, trust documents, and life insurance policies.
• Find the deceased's address book or contact list.
• Stop the mail forwarding or set up a hold.

In the first three days, the service

The obituary and eulogy both belong in this window. Our guides on how to write an obituary and how to write a eulogy walk through each. For phrasing the donation request, see in lieu of flowers wording.

• Decide on burial or cremation, if not already specified.
• Choose a date and venue with the funeral home.
• Decide who will speak, and what music will play.
• Order the casket, urn, or both. Order flowers, or request donations.
• Choose a photograph for the program.
• Draft and submit the obituary.
• Decide on a reception location.

In the first week, the people

• Notify extended family, close friends, employers, colleagues.
• Post on social media, if the family chooses to.
• Arrange travel for out-of-town family.
• Coordinate meals (a sign-up sheet helps).
• Designate someone to receive flowers and cards.
• Choose a memorial fund, if you are asking for donations.

For the day of the service

• Print programs (most funeral homes do this).
• Print a guestbook or use a digital one.
• Arrange transportation between the service and burial.
• Designate two family members to greet attendees.
• Eat something before. You will not feel like it. Try anyway.

In the weeks after

• Send thank-you cards to anyone who brought food or made donations.
• Begin the work of closing accounts and transferring assets.
• Cancel subscriptions, memberships, and recurring bills.
• If a memorial page is part of the family's plan, build it now while memories are fresh.
• Schedule one quiet day for yourself. You will need it.

What you do not have to do alone

Funeral directors are experienced guides. They will not push you, and they will know the local rules. Faith communities, neighbors, and grief counselors are also part of the support network. Lean on all three.

For the printed handout itself, see our funeral program template. For the kitchen-table cost conversation, see cremation vs burial cost. For livestream coordination, see funeral livestream tips.